“When you want to hit the delete key, that’s often the good stuff.” I heard these words more than three months ago–on August 28, to be exact. Yet here they’ve come again, worming their way into my mind. Maybe I’d prefer to ignore the sentiment, this advice I received at a writing workshop led by the amazing Cynthia Morris. Perhaps I really like the delete key and all the power it provides.
Deleting allows me to avoid vulnerability, you see. It lets me pretend I’ve got it all together, and, ahhhhhh, doesn’t that sound just grand? I don’t know about you, but as far as I’m concerned, avoiding uncertainty sounds nothing short of fantastic, in writing AND in life. But–you know where this is headed–that ain’t gonna happen.
And so, here I am. Announcing to you that I want to start a business. I’m afraid it might sound silly, but that sentence was really hard for me to type. Writing it down nearly (not quite, but nearly) brought a tear to my eye. I ended up taking a long pause afterward, for, I don’t know, probably 40 whole seconds. Just to let it sink in. Then I read it over and an actual tear came next. Next, the fact of the crying made me mad. (I’m SO not a fan of the whole vulnerability thing, remember?)
Thankfully, I’ve just signed up for a forum that’s giving me a structure to start talking about this. A few days ago a FB friend of mine suggested I check out Quest2016 on Jefferey Davis’ Tracking Wonder site. Over the course of 12 days (starting today), participants receive 12 prompts from 12 visionaries to help them envision the next 12 months. I’m glad my friend suggested it, because the Quest does in fact suit my intentions right now. Indeed, I signed right up.
This is my entrepreneurial art journal. You heard me right. I keep an art journal devoted to my business aspirations. Adding art to an endeavour always sweetens the pot for me. So I bought a discounted sketchbook, then used fabric scraps and ModPodge to decorate the cover. The pages contain collages of paper scraps and washi tape.
Today’s prompt (which comes from mindfulness expert Susan Piver) goes something like this: What do you need to tell yourself about 2016? For me, the timing of this new year happens to coincide with plans to explore my business ideas. Last month I sold a townhome I’d owned, but hadn’t lived in for years. No longer a reluctant landlord, I now get to focus on starting a new part-time job. This time, it’ll be one I choose, and I couldn’t be more grateful.
I discovered The Creative Entrepreneur by Lisa Sonora Beam several months ago. Its combination of art and practicality is what drew me in. I particularly love that it features a shiny silver SWOT analysis, a key tool in making a business plan.
Having this new burst of time, energy, and money, is a huge and necessary advtantage. Still, in order to succeed, I need to give myself permission to let it be a quest. If I look at this new venture as a finite thing, a task to be completed, I’ll choke my dreams before they start. Getting caught by perfectionism can sometimes be my M.O. But I’m learning to overcome this tendency. I’ve found that it cripples me, and these days I’m more interested in progress than proving I can get everything right.
Discipline, meaning, heart. All these will be necessary as I move foward.
Instead, I need to embrace the act of seeking. I need to turn curiosity into a verb. After all, there’s a reason quests have endured throughout time in literature. There’s a reason just about every grade-school student loves video games. Quests aren’t interesting because their heroes already live where he or she wants to be. Rather, such stories live on because their journeys–yep, usually long ones–involve discovery and travel and failure and confusion and hope and renewal. I’ve never started a business before, but I’m pretty sure the process will be less like a static accomplishment and more like an epic trek.
I ripped this heading out of an old book given to me by my friend Heidi at one of her Crafternoons. She’d fished the book out of a recycling bin, solely for use in a future craft project. Thanks, Miss Heidi!
“It’s okay to be on a quest.” “It’s okay to be on a quest.” This is the mantra I need to keep telling myself next year. Along the way, I plan to record some things I discover about becoming an business creator. No, I don’t know where it’ll lead. But, hey, maybe that’s all right. Because, as the saying (now) goes, it’s okay to be on a quest.
Best of luck on your new business adventure. If you never plunge and try how will you ever know? All the best 🙂
Thanks, @60while60. If anyone would know about jumping in and exploring, it’d be you!
WISHING YOU THE BEST. BEAUTIFUL ART WORK!
Thank you, Beth! What’s a business plan without art, right?
You can do it and you are well on your way. 🙂
Nomzi, you just gave me chills. I appreciate your support.
You are most welcome dear. Enjoy this moment. 🙂
Sending you massive amounts of good wishes for a successful quest and new business!! 🙂
Eeee, thank you Mercedes Mosaics!!
Excited for you and wishing you all the luck! This is a brave post and I’m looking forward to reading more about the Quest (with a deliberate capital Q!)
I like the sound of the deliberate capital Q, Linda. 🙂
Really an insightful posting…and well written! You have for me thinking too…I am so glad that property is sold that was a heavy stone to carry around for so many years. Now with your quest stated and developing you will be once be fueling the creative juices
Sent from my iPhone
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Yes, Marlene, I feel so much lighter now that that huge stone is gone. Thanks for your support!
Thanks so much for sharing! So much here to come back to – the Quest looks intriguing and that book – The Creative Entrepeneur – looks amazing.
Gosh I could relate to that vulnerability about sharing one’s plans, one’s creative work… Sometimes it is just about taking a deep breath and putting it out there, which often goes against what creatives/artists are taught about refinement, perfection. Well done on taking the plunge!
This jogs my memory of a blog post I read a while back, which may or may not be food for thought:
http://thepalerook.com/2015/06/05/artists-statement-part-two/
Reading about the writer’s experience of women’s reluctance at times to put their work out there has helped me recognise it in myself and try to reframe the language and activities of self-promotion etc.
Wishing you all the best with the business!
Peggy, I was heartily touched by your comment even before I read the post you sent from the Pale Rock. Indeed, her words moved me to tears, particularly given the fact that your laser-beam insight connected me to her work. I love that you’re reframing your throughts and actions around self-promotion. I continue to look forward to seeing what’s next for you! Thank you for this; it means more than you know.
darn…lost my posting. any ideas? marlene
I got the one one the newest post! I hope that’s the one you meant. 🙂